Tag: Carer

My Week!
Life Sparkles

My Week!

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Well last week was a busy one indeed. Some days just don’t go to plan so perhaps I should forget the plans, go with the flow and just do what I can, when I can. If only!!

So many things happened, the start of Advent, I absolutely love this magical season. Christmas has well and truly arrived in my City and it is just wonderful to see it alive with hustle and bustle and Christmas preparations. I mentioned that to someone in the office last Friday afternoon and they said they found it to be “typical Friday lunchtime stress and angst”. It’s all about perception I guess.

Here are a few photo’s from the past week. It hasn’t been without the usual caring woes which have stepped up somewhat as we are now in “Sundown” season. Sometimes you just have to bow your head, pray and weather the storm until your sparkle returns. 

Life Sparkles

Let’s Start Again…Diet and Exercise

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I have lost count of the times this year I have “started” to be healthy. Eat the right food, drink plenty of water, exercise. I start off so well with great intentions and then whoops…there goes that chocolate bar…oh dear, did I really just eat that cupcake…are those unattended biscuits I see on the plate?

Picture via Pinterest 

Being the main carer it is important that I keep myself healthy in order to look after my parents. However, being the main carer also means that generally I don’t sit down and eat meals, I tend to grab what I can and eat on the go either at home or when I get to the office in the afternoon’s, everything is rushed, or at least appears to be.

I love fruit and vegetables and I do eat a lot of them. I love fish and chips, Indian food and pizza and I do try to keep those delights for treat nights. I need to try harder.

I love walking, I re-started running a few weeks ago as strangely I really enjoyed it when I started running for the first time in January this year. It was a huge achievement for me to run 5k for Cancer Research in June. I am very surprised at how quickly I lost the fitness I had gained and I really want to re-gain it.

I have become more conscious of how what we eat affects our bodies and how exercise affects our hearts and brains. Everywhere you look there are articles about eating healthy, moving more, getting fresh air and protecting ourselves from the onset of diseases in later life.


Picture via Pinterest 

I have 14 pounds to lose, just one stone. My clothes are tight, I can’t get into some of my favourite dresses and as for my jeans…let’s not go there!! Although I’m not stressing about this I know I’ll feel better when the excess weight has gone. As I get older I notice the fat distribution area has changed, it is predominantly the tummy area which can be the worst area to carry fat, health wise.

So, once again, I’m starting to get healthy. Time to eat healthier, fresh, non-processed foods. To move more, to walk more, to build up the running, to dance even if it is just around my bedroom. To leave the chocolate, cupcakes and the fish and chips to treat days and to look after my body, my mind and my wellbeing. I want to be as fit and healthy as I can to care for my parents, they are depending on me. I want to be as fit and healthy as I can for me, for my later life and I’m thinking I need to start preparing now. I know there is no guarantee that I will be fit and healthy in my older years but at least I’ll have done what I can to try…if I can just stick to my healthy plan…bring on the willpower!!


Picture via Pinterest

Thank you for reading my blog 😀

Life Sparkles

Colours of the Mind.

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Sometimes, getting out for a walk in the air is just what you need to clear your head. There are days I am totally bogged down with responsibilities; my parents, my job, running the home, the list goes on and I’m sure you can identify with some if not all of the above.

Time flies and as much as I try to plan ahead to fit things in, I have had to learn to just totally go with the flow and do things as and when I can. This is not easy when you look around and see a million and one things that need to be done…but they have to wait. On the other side of life, the day job can’t just go with the flow, it still remains structured, timetabled, intact and is in total conflict with caring and home. But you just get on with it don’t you, because you have to.

My singing is a pure release, love, love, love it 😍 A real de-stressor. I really must write more about this hobby!

Anyway I digress, I wanted to share some pictures I took on a recent walk. It was a cold, bright, sunny Autumn day and this year the colours have been just so beautiful. When you walk, breathe in the air and see these fabulous creations around you, you cannot help but feel blessed. Blessed for what we have, blessed for our role in life, whatever the joys and challenges.  I hope they give you a sense of their beauty, the freedom from brain noise and the mental clarity that takes over when you take time out.

Such stunning Red.

This is one of my favourite pictures, I love the sunlight on the leaf.

The berries look so vibrant, makes me think of Christmas decor.

I love to look at trees…

I also love to run through the leaves, we all deserve to set our inner child free!

Autumn Sunset.

Thank you for reading my blog. Have a super sparkling day.

Life Sparkles

The Last Time.

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I sit in the kitchen, cold and alone. Slowly the thoughts in my mind unfold.

When was the last time you laughed out loud?  When was the last time you didn’t feel down?  When was the last time your home felt peace? When was the last time you felt complete? When was the last time you walked hand in hand, by the edge of the ocean, barefoot on the sand? When was the last time you felt carefree? Not a worry, no nerves, no anxiety. When was the last time you felt like you? Where is your life, the one that you knew. Where are your dreams, your hopes and your plans? Battered by storms taken out of your hands. 

Embrace every moment, live and be free, for you never know when the last time will be.

Life Sparkles

In the quiet…

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In the quiet of the early morning, before the day gets started, I find myself reflecting on the day ahead and thinking of the days that are gone.  It is unusual for me to have time for these few minutes of thought. Usually Mom is up very early as the morning’s are so bright, she thinks it is much later in the day and therefore I too must get up. At 4 am it can seem like a very long day ahead, especially when I have to attend to the day job a few hours later and it will possibly be 11 pm or later when I finally get into bed. 

Although it is early July and this morning the sun streams beautifully through the window, there is a feel of Autumn about the day. There isn’t any of the heat of Summer, the morning has a look of late September. I hear Mom walking around her room and I’m wondering if I will soon have to start the day; preparing breakfast, putting on some music, awaiting Dad getting up to join us in the kitchen which will enable me to get a few tasks done.

I’m lucky in that I can go out, see himself when he too is not caring for his Mother, catch up with my friends or perhaps attend a gig or event.  Often I am called home from these small snatches of release as either Dad just can’t cope with the day or with Mom if she has a “Sundowning” moment.  Not having great health himself, I’ve noticed Dad has become more frail and is less able to deal with things, which leaves me to step in to ensure all is covered.

So, in the quiet of the day, when I get a few minutes to myself I wonder. I wonder should I give up the day job? Stay at home more? Throw myself into my dream of singing; playing the guitar and completing my studies?  I wonder about the people like me, some with families of their own, trying to look after their parents or care for other members of the family, friends or neighbours whilst also trying to keep their own life on the go and enjoy some down time. 

I’ve had thoughts recently about setting up a FB page for Carers, to inject some positive sparkle into their day. What do people do to keep their sparkle alive in the toughest of conditions? How do they release the stress? What has happened to their hopes and dreams? 

In the quiet of the day…our minds are perhaps not very quiet at all.

Thank you for reading my blog 😎


Picture via Pinterest

Life Sparkles

Caring. Who Cares?  

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Who cares? Was the first chapter in one of my study modules a few years ago. The actual point of the chapter is not so much about the person requiring care but about the caregiver. Who cares for the caregiver?

Over the past seven months I have become more and more of a caregiver to my Mom after her fall and breaking of her hip. The hip has healed just fine, Mom walks more and more without the walking frame but Mom has changed. Before the hip fall, for about four years, we experienced very black days, Mom’s mood was nothing short of scary. However since the hip fall, those moods have given way to something else. 

It appears that Mom had very little Iron in her body and has been taking Iron supplements which have really improved a number of things; mood, stability, concentration and confusion, normal Mom has returned!! That’s all great but now we experience ‘Sundown Dementia’ which it appears affects people who do not have, or have not been diagnosed with dementia as well as people who do have dementia. Mom does not have dementia, this is not me saying so, the healthcare teams have confirmed this. Sundown Dementia affects people’s body clocks, especially in the Winter time when days are dark most of the time. My father and I have spent many a night awake and with Mom as she tries to break out of the house to go home. She accuses us of keeping her prisoner. I get called all names you can think of and then some. It switches on and off like a light switch and we experience an all nighter about once every three weeks. I am not liked at all by my Mom some days and that hurts a lot, but the next day, the next hour, all is well, till next time. We can get smaller sundown moments during the day but we have found that if sufficient water is drank, it is almost a miracle cure!! Getting Mom to drink water is another story…

I’m lucky that my boss is so understanding and I’ve been allowed to work from home and phase a return to the office. This has worked well at home but still causes me anxiety as I await a phone call that something is wrong with either Mom or Dad. I’ve suddenly become responsible for almost everything from healthcare to shopping, cooking to entertainer, cleaner to, well, carer. It’s hard. Don’t get me wrong, I have no problem doing this for my parents. Sometimes though I wonder where have I gone? How has every minute of the day become consumed with items on my ‘to do’ lists.

Lack of sleep, stress and anxiousness lead me to the doctor myself. I cannot be ill. Who cares for them if I’m not here. After some tests the doctor was satisfied that my symptoms were all stress related. I had to find some ways to relieve some pressure and get some me time.

If you’ve read my blogs before you know I do Zumba once a week, I’ve taken up running following the ‘Couch to 5k’ plan (that’s a whole other blog post), I love to sing and am visiting my vocal coach each week and if I get the opportunity to see my b/f now and again it’s a bonus. These things have truly helped me to escape, in mind, body and spirit, even for half an hour. I never thought that a fifteen minute soak in the bath would ever become a rare treat for me. That a day out walking with himself was so special because I can’t go missing for a whole day anymore. I feel sad, anxious, depressed and tearful and yet I also feel happy, joyful and I’ve not lost my sparkle. After all, you just have to paint on that smile and get on with it. My parents gave up time and effort to bring me up, it’s payback time.

  
Picture via Pinterest

Thank you for reading my blog 😎

Caring – small treats to care for you.
Life Sparkles

Caring – small treats to care for you.

Dawn - The Sparkle Diaries.Leave a comment

One thing I have noticed over the past few months is that time for me has more or less disappeared. I was always busy; work, studies, time with my b/f, attending Irish dances/Country Music shows, Zumba…you get the picture…life was busy although not without anxiousness, stress and worry about my parents and I was taking on more and more at home.

Since Mom’s fall and her good, albeit slow recovery, everything apart from home has taken a back seat. Slowly I have been able to re-introduce a return to Zumba, my time with my b/f has drastically reduced, I’m always far behind on the studies but things eventually get done.

There was however no time for me, no time to look after myself and I am regularly reminded by friends that I am no good to anyone if I don’t take care of myself. 

I’ve built myself a small ritual twice a day when I wash and moisturise my face. It’s almost like a mini treat and it makes me feel good but doesn’t take me any longer than usual. I’ve done this firstly to give myself a little boost for the day but also to use up all the bottles and jars of beauty products that have built up in drawers and cupboards over the years. So a double whammy really!

Firstly I have been washing my face with Aveda Botanical Kinetics which has the typical Aveda aroma of  coconut, jojoba, lavender and camomile and has the benefit of waking your senses up first thing in the morning and yet also soothing you before bed.

 

I’m a recent convert to L’Occitane – absolutely love their products and their shops. I had bought some Christmas Gifts from there and purchased a gift box at a specially discounted price in order to try the products myself. So, the next steps after the face wash is the facial spritzer spray.

  
This is beautiful and light on the skin, no heavy perfume and the face feels silky to the touch once applied. Next to the moisturiser which is again from L’Occitane.

  
This is just heavenly and I have noticed a real softness to my face and neck over the past couple of weeks.

Spending almost two weeks in hospital with Mom after her accident had completely dried out my skin. Once home I tried some facial oil I had been given as a tester, the results were fabulous. Within a couple of days my facial skin was regaining moisture and elasticity. It worked so well I now use it at night before bed and have since purchased some for future use. This skin miracle find is by Tropics Skincare and is named Elixir.

  
Now and again I take the rare opportunity to soak aching muscles in the bath. Again, L’Occitane, a find from the box of treats purchased to try out. The Lavender aroma is so soothing and the water feels so silky and soft. Even a fifteen minute soak does you the world of good.

  
The responsibility and caring for others can really take it’s toll on you in so many ways. I have found that these twice daily facial wash rituals have given me a lift, some self care and made me feel like I’ve had a small skin treat. They set me up for the day and help me to settle at night.  It is worth trying something new or finding something that doesn’t take hours of time you don’t have, to give yourself a little lift. You deserve it. 

Thank you for reading my blog 😎

Pictures via Pinterest and product websites

Life Sparkles

Self Care – Keep Your Own Sparkle.

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Oh how I have advised people in the past about taking care of themselves, not overworking, eating properly, getting more sleep, you know the kind of thing.  As always, we are not so good at taking our own advice.

I’m tired, there, I  admit it, the last two months have more or less worn me out.  I empathise with carers so much more now that I have an understanding of their plight, looking after a loved one.  I at least have the knowledge that Mom is recovering slowly from the broken hip and each day gains a little more power in her leg, gains independence and also confidence in her walking.  I am still working from home but this week sees me begin a slow, phased return to the office, one afternoon only.  But it has been very tiring, caring for my parents, cooking, cleaning, shopping, working the day job from home, catching up with studies and attempting to follow my love of singing.

I’ve not done badly, I have returned to Zumba class on Wednesday evening which I love.  The music is so wonderful you just escape into that Latin Beat, the moves can be difficult but it really doesn’t feel like a work out and although I ache afterwards, it is a good ache.  I’ve escaped for an hour for some me time and yes, that is important.  At first I felt selfish at leaving the house to attend the class but my lovely Mom, bless her, said I needed to do something for myself and get out of the house.

Last week I returned to my vocal coaching and oh how good that felt.  The drive there, the hour going through my breathing exercises, the vocal scales and then singing a couple of the songs I had been working on, it was like a release of the soul.  Thankfully, although I had not been to my vocal coach since mid August, it seems I have not lost my pitch and my breathing hasn’t gone to pot, phew!!  This week I have been learning “You raise me up”, surprisingly not many lyrics to this song but a lot of variation in notes.

These two small steps have helped me to feel like me again.  I can see how easily it can be to get lost within yourself, when you are indoors 24/7 and suddenly plunged into a different life course.  How apt that my current studies are about our perceived life course and our plans and how things we do, or perhaps things that happen to others can alter our lives.

Tomorrow afternoon I face the wide world of the city centre when I venture to the office for the first time since mid – September…I’ll keep you posted.

Thank you for reading my blog 🙂

And Breathe...take care of you!
And Breathe…take care of you!