Category: Life Sparkles

Life Sparkles

Going Retro!

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Suddenly I find myself in the fourth week post leaving the day job. Where has the time gone? Time seems to be flying by even quicker than usual. It has been busy at home, getting the walk in bath and shower fitted; which unfortunately hasn’t been without issue. I’ve learnt a lot about thermostatic pumps, gravity fed systems, air locks and central heating pumps too! However, that’s a whole other blog post.

In the midst of my caring role, I appear to have gone a little retro. Feeling free from the pressure and deadlines of the day job has been amazing. Having such lovely Summer weather has reminded me of teenage years, not a care in the world years. A far cry from thinking about stair lifts, prescriptions and Sundown nights. I’m enjoying looking after my parents, I try to make the days as happy as possible and also try to get a little me time, which can be a bit hit and miss.

So, one Sunday I gave my parents peaches and cream for dessert, they loved it! We haven’t had that since I was a child.


I’ve started buying Palmolive soap again. I adore the aroma especially in the Summer evenings as it brings back memories of being at my Sister’s house as a child, with my nieces and how my Sister would wash us after a day playing in the sunshine, with Palmolive soap.


As a teenager I drove my parents mad until they bought me a pair of Dr Scholls, they were very popular in the late 70’s early 80’s. Yes, you’ve guessed it…I thought about them recently and guess what, they are back in fashion so I was able to buy myself a pair.


I’m doing my best to keep the garden up to standard, my parents are keen gardeners but have been unable to do anything in the garden for a few years, so now I’m having a go. I’m very happy with my Hydrangea. I have loved these blooms from a very early age, they bring back memories of Mom and Dad’s first house when I was four years old.


I have the radio on during the afternoon when I’m pottering around doing tasks and I listen to BBC Radio 2. Steve Wright in the afternoon. That really does bring back lots of memories especially with the music that is played, it’s no wonder I’ve gone retro!

One thing I have learnt since starting to care full time; things get done as and when. I may have a plan or a “to do” list but often life has other thoughts. There is no point in getting stressed, I’m learning to go with the flow of the day, whatever that may be.


It’s an uneasy transition from daughter to carer, I’m hanging on to the daughter label for as long as I can.  With regards to my retro period, I can only offer these words from Madonna in my defence. From the song “This used to be my playground”.

“Don’t hold on to the past, well that’s too much to ask”.

Life Sparkles

A New Chapter.

Dawn - The Sparkle Diaries.8 Comments

I keep thinking of Autumn or the month of September these past few days. I’m not sure if that is down to the more Autumnal weather we’ve had in the last week or a state of mind because last Friday was my final day at the day job. Am I seeing myself as somehow suddenly reaching the Autumn of life because I’ve given up the day job, my career, my corporate city chick persona?

Friday was a more emotional day than I expected it to be. For all the upset during my notice period my manager did give me a lovely speech at the presentation. However, as she was talking about the reason I was leaving, it suddenly hit me full force the reason I was leaving my job, my friends and colleagues and my corporate life, in order to care for my parents for the rest of their lives. I felt so sad, sad that this was my role now, end of life care and I cried. I couldn’t speak to my colleagues to thank them as I choked up, some of them also cried, it is a position any of us can find ourselves in. I also felt relief. Relief that the stress and pressure of having to log in everyday, make the journey to the office and back is gone. My day is free to flow with whatever is going on in the home without worrying about deadlines, meetings and reporting.

Last week was also fairly exhausting on the home front. Dad’s knee swelled up due to arthritic joints and he couldn’t put any weight on it at all. Thank God we still had the walking frames from when Mom broke her hip. This though completely put him out of action and meant more running about for me, which I have no problem doing, on the go is good but oh so tiring. Dad being out of action affected Mom. We had two days of partial hunger strike as Dad wasn’t doing their breakfast as usual and on Tuesday night we had a Sundown night; up all night and no sleep until 6:30 am. I get up at 7 am for work; I have no idea how I have worked through these post Sundown work days.  I think I’m so used to them I just go into automatic pilot. However, from now on with no day job to worry about, being up all night is not going to be as troublesome as before…I hope!
So between Dad’s knee, Mom’s hunger strikes and sundowns, lack of sleep,  work and leaving work, it has been a fairly exhausting and emotional week. Although I leave the corporate city chick behind, I say bring on the carer, domestic goddess and songstress and let’s see the challenges, blessings and positives of the new chapter ahead.

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Picture via Pinterest

© @aurorasparkles 2017

Life Sparkles

In the words of Spandau Ballet…

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…”these are my salad days”, (that is what they sing in “Gold” isn’t it or have I been wrong all these years?). Anyway, I digress, as usual!

Last week we had a heatwave in the UK. Apparently five consecutive days where we reach 30 degrees celsius, eighty-six farenheit, is officially a heatwave. I loved it! Blue skies, sunshine, warmth and a rare chance to wear Summer clothes. Let’s face it, we don’t get brilliant Summers so any chance to enjoy the good weather and we’re out there.

This beautiful weather kick started me back to healthy eating. After my gall bladder removal operation I ate very little, eventually progressing to fresh soup, fruit and bran flakes. I lost a stone in weight and felt great, my clothes were not straining to fit anymore. Of course as I healed I fell back to bad habits, biscuits, chocolate and yes even cake. I admit I enjoyed it better when I was eating healthy and not having to worry about what I was eating, because it was all healthy. I just need to keep the momentum up now that the weather is back to rain between the showers and colder than average for the time of year. Here comes Summer 🏖☀️😎

You know it’s Summer when the Strawberries are sweet.

I think I’m addicted to falafel 🥙 

Making good use of my Ninja again!

Yes, falafel again.

I’m also addicted to avocado 🥑 but limit my fix…not the cheapest – wait for the bargains.

Life Sparkles

Ramblings.

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Once again it has been a while. Far too long in fact. It has been so busy but then when isn’t it busy?!! The amount of times I’ve sat down with the intention of updating my blog, of posting the latest thoughts, happenings and general day to day of life and yet for one reason or another it just doesn’t happen.

After my “Leap of Faith” blog post about giving up the day job to care full time for my parents, things took a decidedly, let’s say “unfriendly”, “unsympathetic” turn with my manager at work and I experienced a very stressful, pressured and upsetting three weeks during May. After a fight back from me, things during my notice period have settled back and my final working day is Friday 30th June.

I have mixed feelings about this. After all, it is the end of an era for me, the end of the “day job”, the end, for now, of my career as a “City Chick” in the corporate world. Yet there is something quite liberating about this change. I thought I would feel sadness at training someone to do my role and handover tasks and I haven’t at all, I’ve enjoyed doing it. Time to hand the baton on so to speak. 

I’m enjoying looking after my parents, being “Mom”, although I’d much prefer not to be having to do this, this is where I am, I love them and I’m going to be as positive as I can about my new chapter in life with them and caring for them. Thankfully we are still at a stage where I can have a little me time to spend on my music, more studies, a little voluntary work from home and yes blogging, expect to see lots more blogging!

This particular post was supposed to be me, owning up that I had fallen back into awful unhealthy eating habits as I recovered post op and how with the hot weather this week I had redeemed myself…that one will have to wait for another day, soon…I promise, soon.

So I’ll say bye for now with a photo of my hanging basket which I am so proud of. Not known for my green finger prowess I cannot believe I managed to grow this from scratch. I might make a domestic goddess of myself yet!!

© @aurorasparkles 2017 🌟

Life Sparkles

Leap of faith!

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Well it’s been a while since I had a chance to update my blog. I’ve always got lots of ideas of what to write about but recently time to do so has not been on my side. 

However, in the last few weeks I’ve made a decision and it wasn’t an easy one to make. I’ve wrestled with this over and over in my mind for months and really I don’t know why it has taken me so long to get here because the signs and signals of the right thing to do have been almost slapping me in the face. It’s time to take a complete leap of faith and give up the day job.


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I can’t continue to juggle the day job with caring for my parents as both take up all my time and my parents are more important than spreadsheets! Being off work recovering from my operation I seen that my parents need more care and attention than before. I want to give them that care and attention. My employers have been fantastically supportive of me allowing me to work flexibly. My job is demanding, filled with deadlines and tight turnarounds and I think it’s only fair they have someone doing the job who is there, in the office daily. Although I work from home most of the time these days and I get the job done, I can no longer fight the feeling that it’s time to let go, time to change, time to move on.


Picture via Pinterest 

This isn’t a decision I’ve made lightly. I had a long chat with our Doctor who agreed that perhaps now, in my caring capacity, it was also time to do some things I enjoy and have freedom from the demands of the day job. My close friends have agreed and even himself who up to recently has been very much against this move, said he would support my decision, the time is right to change.

I spoke to my manager last week and gave her my decision and on a personal level she said she fully understood but she is very sorry to lose me. Later she contacted me asking me to consider job shares, logging in for two hours every day or one day a week working as a support to my replacement. I have considered the one day a week and although it sounds like a great idea, the more I think about it the more my gut feeling says no. It would still be a demand that one day a week and I need to be free of time restrictions as I have to go with the flow of demands at home.

I have three months notice to work, with accrued holiday I could be day job free by early July. I feel liberated, free, excited and scared all at once. I have no idea how this is going to pan out, I just know, somehow, that this is right.


Picture via Pinterest 

Life Sparkles

Officially…

Dawn - The Sparkle Diaries.14 Comments

… I’m an unpaid carer. There, I’ve written it down so it must be true.  I’ve been caring for both of my parents one way or another since September 2015. I work part-time, my employers have been incredibly supportive allowing me to work from home and the office. I study, soon to complete (I hope) my BSc (Hons) in Health and Social Care. I love to sing and have been going to see my fabulous vocal coach on as regular a basis as I can. I have a fantastic b/f who is also a carer for his Mother and I have wonderful friends who totally accept that I might make a coffee date with them and either have to break it or rush off home as I’ve received a telephone call.

It hasn’t been an easy transition for me. Although I moved home some years ago to “look after” my parents, I had a good life. Worked full time, out every weekend, had short breaks and holidays alongside the limited caring I actually needed to do back then. Now it is very different.  My only night away from home in two years was when I was recently in hospital having an operation and my b/f stopped with my parents to ensure they were safe. (He has cover, I don’t). I see my b/f perhaps once in three weeks due to both our caring responsibilities and these days I feel blessed if we get an hour together in a coffee shop, it really is the little things that matter.


Life has changed, a lot. I have encountered many emotions on this caring journey. Fear, anger, jealousy, impatience and once or twice out of sheer tiredness and frustration I’ve shouted and then cried bitter tears for doing so. I have also experienced such love for my parents it is untrue. I’ve learnt to look after them but let them have the little bit of independence they still have and to do what they want to do…although I am so like a Mom to tell them off! We laugh, we pray, we sing songs together.  I’ve become more relaxed and less tense, more patient, more tolerant and less stressed out. I feel absolutely blessed to be looking after them as difficult as it can be.

So this week I took the plunge and contacted the relevant department to be registered as the carer of my parents. I’ve put this off for so long and I don’t know why? Wishing it wasn’t true won’t change anything. Now that I’m registered it feels almost liberating that I’ve finally come to terms with life as it is right now. As I mentioned in an earlier blog, this post operative recovery time has really given me time to think. 

There are a lot of things I’ve had to change in my life due to my caring role and yes I do get the odd pang of envy when someone is booking a holiday or a late night out but honestly, I’m so happy to be the one caring for my Mom and Dad, I wouldn’t change that for the world.


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Life Sparkles

Sometimes…

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Sometimes I have everything and nothing to say. My mind can be full of thoughts, ideas for blog posts, ideas for the future, to try this, to re-visit that and sometimes I don’t do any of them. I have lists; lists to remind me to read the electric meter and send the reading in, lists of the shopping to do, lists of upcoming birthdays, medical appointments and repeat prescriptions for my parents, to do lists for work, lyrics and backing track lists and study lists…and sometimes nothing gets done and yet all gets done on time.

It has been a strange month for me. Pre-operation I had visions of me being up, about and active within a couple of days and spending my sick leave time from the day job catching up on loads of things associated with home. Oh how wrong I was!! Post operation was very different from my ‘plan’. Almost four weeks on although much stronger I am far from fully recovered. This process has given me time to think…a lot of time to think.  I have learnt that I have to listen to my body. I have learnt to slow right down and rest. I have learnt to walk slowly, to do things slowly and to be thankful for all the blessings I have in my life. Walking in the garden last week building up my mobility, I took notice of the flowers and trees as they started to bloom, their beauty, renewal and promise of the future. I usually glance at the garden when passing by at speed, passing by without really appreciating the beauty in front of me. 

One item in the garden I have always taken notice of is the Willow Tree, I love it. I love how it dances, sways to the breeze, zumba’s to the gales and tip toes gently to the slightest breath of air. I watch it through all the seasons, bare in the Winter and glinting in the high Summer sunshine. It brings me peace. I captured a Spring breeze blowing the new growth last week, it brings such calmness when I watch it.

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The days have gone by quickly even though some days it feels as if I haven’t achieved very much, but I’m healing and perhaps some days that is just enough to be doing. I remember in the weeks before my operation that I was struggling somewhat. Walking through the station after getting off the train and then walking across the city to the office, it felt like such an effort. I was tired. Caring, Sundown nights, working, studying, looking after the home…it was all starting to wear me out.  I believe God sent me something to make me stop. To make me rest, to open my eyes and look around and stop trying to do everything and be everywhere at a hundred miles an hour and just be. 

By slowing me down, God has got me to wake up and smell the Roses and the blossoms of life.

Life Sparkles

Springtime, Changes and Renewal.

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It was a beautiful Spring day today; bright, sunny, blue skies with a chilly wind. As I have been cooped up all week since returning from hospital, I decided to take a slow stroll around the garden, I needed some fresh air. The trees and plants are coming to life again, after the long, dark Winter months, the lighter days and sunshine has renewed nature and it is beautiful.

As I walked around viewing the buds on the trees and the blooms of the snowdrops,  I found myself thinking of my health and recovery from the gallbladder removal surgery. My body is also now enjoying a renewal of sorts. It is suffering the post operative trauma right now but if I look after it, do the right things, feed it the right foods, my body will heal and be strong again, another beautiful miracle of nature and the amazing body we have been blessed with.

Just as the landscape around us changes with the seasons we too are constantly changing, our minds, our personal style, our life goals, hopes and dreams. Spring brings everything to new life, we change, we grow, we heal, just as the flowers around us reach for the sunshine and brighter days, we too reach for the beauty of life.


I didn’t know I had any of these little beauties in the garden.


There is always something of beauty to see if you look hard enough.


Refreshed and renewed my Shamrock looks great ahead of Patrick’s Day.


My favourite tree in the garden, the Weeping Willow, is starting to bud.

© A Touch of Irish Sparkle 2017

Life Sparkles

Post Operation- Recovery starts here!

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For all my positivity I have to admit Monday was pretty dreadful. The effects of the anaesthetic were just awful. I had injections in my legs and my tummy and just kept getting sick until the night nurse gave me nothing short of a miracle drug at 1 am and I started getting better from there.

In order to stop me shaking and warm me up (veins had gone into hiding) the anaesthetist got me singing – the team got a rendition of “Rose Garden” – a first, no-one has ever sang in that room before. It wasn’t how I expected my first public performance to be but somehow through the nerves and anxiety I managed to sing.

I’m home, I’m sore and I can’t move very much. It hurts to hold the iPad! The consultant said the operation was a success. About a month until full sparkle powers will be restored 💫✨🌟 He did an amazing job, very tidy and my four scars are small.

I survived and I’m healing. I’m finding it hard to adjust to not moving around at high speed. Lifting a cup or a plate hurts. Laughing hurts, a lot! Deep breathing hurts. Peppermint Tea and Extra Strong Mints are helping with the wind (they blow your tummy up with air in order to reach your organs). Thankfully so far I have not suffered too badly with this displaced air. 

I have very little appetite at the moment which won’t do me any harm at all. I had far too much appetite beforehand. So far I have managed toast, soup, plain biscuits and fruit. I need to eat the food which will aid recovery and although I don’t need to avoid fats and dairy, it is better I don’t introduce them straight away. 

At the moment I can’t sit properly, I sit at an angle and lie in bed propped up at an angle as I can’t lie flat just yet. This is steadily improving, I’m down from four to three pillows. As long as I follow instructions I will heal properly and be back to full health so I am taking this opportunity to start again with the health and fitness. There is no better time than now.

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I am feeling very lucky. I have received so many get well messages, cards and the most beautiful flowers which have cheered me up. Friends have called in to say hello and between us, my parents and I are working out how we do things within the house. Thankfully there isn’t much apart from daily cooking really as I had everything else done pre operation. 


My beautiful flowers.

Gall bladders – what a pain in the ass – actually that’s about the only place I didn’t have a pain 😉Thank goodness for painkillers.

Have you had any surgery similar to mine? Do you have any tips for recovery? What to eat? How long your recovery took? Tomorrow I hope to feel well enough to study, I’ve an assignment due in two weeks…

Life Sparkles

Changes.

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Recently I have read Blogs, Facebook posts and Tweets which all have a similar theme. Change. People are changing. People are swapping their day job, career, lifestyle in order to follow their dream, their passion, to follow what they feel within is their destiny. I felt in awe of these people. They weren’t randomly throwing caution to the wind and resigning right, left and centre. They had thought hard about this decision. Had followed up training courses, downsized their homes as they would no longer be earning as before and as well as feeling excited about the new page in their life, they felt scared too, which was also kind of exciting.

I started to think about me. My job, my hopes and dreams, my life. Other people were making the changes they wanted to, what was stopping me? And then the answer arrived. Me!!! I am stopping me. I’m in my comfort zone with my day job, I like it, I’d go as far as to say I enjoy it but do I still want to be doing it in five years time? Three years time? One year from now?

So, whilst I am in post operative recovery mode, I have a lot of thinking to do.  What do I really want to do and how am I going to make this happen? I’m beginning to think this enforced rest has been sent to me in order to take time to reflect. There are some things about my life I cannot change but there are other aspects that I can change. I’m lacking in the confidence to spread my wings and fly some of those dreams for myself, and that needs to change.

Until the next time…


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